Moronic constituents

Usually, I don't mind the consituent letters that I deal with in my internship. However, about 1/3 of the time I run into writers that I think the world would be better off without. There was one in particular whose case I opened on Friday. This guy claimed that while he and his wife were walking though their property, they were shot at by a negligent hunter. So he writes us complaining that hunters trespassing on private property is all to easy. He also claims that the police are so sympathetic towards hunters that they can not enforce the laws. In his letter he demanded three things:

1.) Make it illegal for a person to park along side a road for the purpose of hunting. Also make it possible for a person to "safely" tow a violator of this proposed "law."
2.) Impose stiffer penalties for police officers who go on private property for hunting.
3.) Make it illegal for land owners to charge for hunting on private property.

As I read his letter, I was just shaking my head. So I wrote back saying more or less:

1.) It is illegal for a person to park along side a road unless it's an emergency. Call the police and have them ticket it! The person is not required to stand by the damn car. Go home and report the license plate number by phone--which is completely safe!
2.) Moron! Cops can't go on your property without a warrant or just cause and they definately can't do it while they are off duty. If they do, they are guilty of trespassing no matter what their intent. Additionally, the legistlature can't pass laws that target only a specific group of people such as cops... it would be challenged in court and declared invalid.
3.) You can't make a law for that! First of all, there would not be enough support in the legislature and residents of the district wouldn't approve either. How can you just say that people can't charge for use of private property. That's not right!

Basically, he wanted new laws that would be self-enforcing because he doesn't believe the police can enforce laws. Maybe it doesn't occur to him that laws are just words on paper. Letters of the law aren't going to sit on the property line and prevent people from trespassing. No matter what laws the representative and the legislature pass, in the final analysis... it is still going to fall to the police. Perhaps this moron can't grasp that. If he wants to solve the problem, he's going to have to talk to them. We make the laws; police enforce them.