Pizza Lies

When it comes to pizza, my dad and I do not see eye to eye very much. He likes weird things on it like, ham, pineapple, and barbecue sauce. I’m more of a traditionalist double the pepperoni and double the cheese and I’m all good. For restaurant pizza, a supreme style is the safe choice--usually a Supreme Pan from Pizza Hut. I remember when I was five or perhaps younger when I asked my dad if I could have a pizza without the monkey eyeballs (what he called black olives). He said that people couldn’t special order a pizza—that everything comes mixed like it is described on the menu. I believed him.

Field trips are awesome. In my opinion, schools don’t use them often enough. In first grade, when I was at Sigsbee Elementary, we went to the main island (Key West). I forget what the main point of the field trip was but I do remember that for lunch, it was planned that we would have pizza in the park. The really cool part was that we were going to go to a Dominos to make the pizza ourselves.

The idea of crowding thirty something 7 year olds into a kitchen with pizza ovens and all sorts of other dangerous objects probably wouldn’t occur to today’s school staff but, hey, these were the 80’s. We played on rusty jungle gyms sitting on top of concrete. The rules were that we had to pick a partner to share the pizza with, we had to agree on two toppings, and then we had to wash our hands before we made the pizza. My partner ended up being pretty-boy asshole from our class. I wanted pepperoni and extra cheese. He wanted green peppers and onions. (Seriously? Of all the available toppings, who goes for peppers?!) We started arguing like little kids do and one of the Dominos guys said that we could split the pizza in half. Assface’s half would get green peppers. My half would get pepperoni.

“You can do that?” I asked.

“Yup.”

“But my dad said that you couldn’t…” And that was when I first realized that what my dad told me wasn’t always the truth. Okay, maybe I figured that out earlier as by this time I knew monkey eyeballs weren’t really being put on pizzas.



Would you believe that I got that pic from Dominos website? That chain rocks!