Don't. Unless you are actually a swimmer. And even then...

A guy down in Florida got ticketed for wearing a speedo. While it may be a fashion crime, is wearing a speedo truly criminal? According to Local6.com’s article, Bob Hezzlewood was ticketed by a county deputy for trespassing at Bonita Beach. Apparently he tried to fight the ticket but the judge tossed out the case. Now he is thinking about suing the sheriff’s department over a violation of his civil rights.

Have you seen some of the skimpy outfits that women wear to the beach? Let me tell you, not all those women have bodies that can handle those strips of fabric. Or rather, those strips of fabric can’t handle those bodies. *shudders*. I say let this and any other guy wear their speedos if they want to. As long as their junk isn’t falling out, I don’t have a problem with it. Personally, I think it’s something to have a chuckle over.

Comments

Anonymous said…
This is the first that I have heard of this but if he was ticketed for trespassing it had nothing to do with the speedo. Am I oversimplifying or are Americans again being too quick in the suing department.
Thu May 15, 11:25:00 AM EDT
David said…
@anon:

Since the beach is public property (I believe), then a trespassing citation may seem odd. After all, how can a citizen trespass on public land? Now let's see if I remember this right... if the community passes an ordinance that says beach goers must be clothed, then it is a trespass because a naked person would be abusing the privilege of using the beach.

The ticketing officer probably felt that this guy's speedo did not fall into the community's guidelines for proper conduct. I'm speculating that those guidelines are pretty subjective considering what women are allowed to wear.

Thanks for commenting!
Thu May 15, 05:46:00 PM EDT
Anonymous said…
trust me.. I was a swimmer for 10 years and have grown used to the speedo! Just turn your head away and try to think of happy thoughts!
Thu May 15, 08:05:00 PM EDT
John Provis said…
Ahh, the banana hammock (also known as the budgie smuggler (budgie: small parrot-like bird - use your imagination as to where the term comes from) or by various other less family-friendly names), Australia's greatest (?!) contribution to the world of fashion...

Strangely, our politicians actually make a point of being photographed in Speedos in public (Google for, for example, Malcolm Turnbull, Peter Debnam, Ted Baillieu, Steve Bracks - all prominent Aussie politicians, all love to get their bits on TV where I'd personally prefer not to be seeing them...) I'm very much a board-shorts guy though, I think Speedos in Australia are mainly work by either competitive swimmers, lifeguards, and over-40s - they've bypassed the 20-something non-athlete demographic entirely, for which I think most of the people I go to the beach with are very grateful. Having said that though, Speedos are in general less revealing than cycling shorts, which I will without a second thought wear while I'm out on the bike.
Fri May 16, 10:13:00 PM EDT
David said…
@Stacey: But competitive swimmers have the body for it, wouldn't you agree?

@John: I think I will skip on Googling your politicians and simply take your word on it. As for the bike shorts, the position of the body as one rides helps. So it's not like you are putting it out there for all to see unlike someone sunbathing, flat on their backs. ...And just so you know... there are baggy cycling shorts. :-P
Fri May 16, 11:23:00 PM EDT
John Provis said…
Wise move on the googling-for-politicians decision there... they tend to turn up on the front pages of newspapers fairly regularly though, which really isn't what I need to see over my morning coffee.

And I've tried the baggy cycling shorts, but they tend to act like a parachute.
Sat May 17, 08:36:00 PM EDT
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